2012 – 9 Years

9 Years!

9 years ago on this day I woke up thinking it was like any other day. How wrong could someone be! Over those 9 years, in thought or in discussing it with various people I have kept changing my mind about “blame”. Who is to blame for my little sister not being here and I keep coming to the fact that if that ignorant, uninsured rider of the moped had not been breaking the law by being on the motorway, Debbie would never have been involved in the accident!

I say ignorant because when the Magistrate asked her in court “did you know you it is illegal for you to be on the motorway”, she answered “no”! She got away with a driving ban and a few hundred pound fine because there was no law to capture the event properly. Fortunately the law has now changed and if it were to have happened today, she would have got up to 5 years in prison. Still not a comparison to the price we all pay daily!

A few weeks ago, I put a picture of Debs on Facebook to mark her birthday! I have been overwhelmed by the number of responses from everyone still remembering, still thinking, still missing Debs. I wonder how Debs would have got on with today’s social media? One thing is true though I’m sure she would have the largest number of friends, followers or connections! Social media has allowed me to republish the Memories Board too so please take a moment to add your entry.

From the bottom of my heart thank you! I thank you for taking those moments in your busy lives to remember Debs when something happens that reminds you of her, and a smile crosses your face! Creating a smile is a great legacy to have!

I love you Debs!

DING! x

2011 – 8 Years

8 Years!

The first thing is that I cannot believe it’s been 8 years! How can that much time go by without my sister in my life? How can that much time go by without the sound of her laugh, or the glint of her eye. So much has happened in the 8 years, things that I know Debs would have loved and been such a huge part of.

I have spoken before about people missing their particular part of Debbie. One of the many many things I miss was how Debs was part of my conscience, she was the invisible voice that would tell me “yeah go for it”, or “forget about them, they are a waste of space”.

As you will see, I have finally got around to redesigning the website. I have been mentioning it for years and have done it at last. Its not complete and I will add to it but there is a new “Memories Board”. I would REALLY appreciate it if you would add your own memories of Debs.

My deepest thanks for the continued interest, support for me and my mum and most importantly, keeping my sister’s memory alive!

DING!

2010 – 7 Years

7 Years!

In the last year we have noticed the calls, messages, and texts relating to Debs have reduced. Its been amazing that we have had so many and each year we sit around and say how incredible it is that people still remember. Yet we also say that we know it will have to stop and people will get on with their lives. I would just like to say a massive thank you to all those who have supported us, called us, texted us and never forgot my little sister.

This does not mean to say that whilst you are going about your lives you dont stop to have a thought about Debs. Im sure there will be many things, many times, that you are reminded of Debs and will have a cheeky smile to yourself whilst you recall the incredible laughing that always followed her (and some times the chaos and trouble). Maybe you still raise a glass and instead of saying Cheers you say Ding! If Deb can continue to live on in your memories in any way, with any frequency then I thank you.

 DING!

2009 – 6 Years

A common conversation we seem to be having these days is discussing how people around the world are remembering Debs; how often, why do they, how they feel. At the time of her death, it was amazing to hear peoples’ stories about what part Debbie played in their respective lives. Whether it was a drinking buddy, a work colleague, a shoulder to cry on or someone who had just met her once and that moment was permanently embedded into memory. One thing that is truly standing the test of the passing 6 years is that whatever the reason, people are remembering Debs and it is one of the things that continues to make me so proud of her. I said in my eulogy that “she made a difference” but I like to think of it as………….

“The DING TOUCH!”

2007 – 4 Years

4 Years! I still cannot believe it is 4 years. The days are no easier but my appreciation for loss is greater than ever. I know what it is like to amble through life with this massive weight. I find myself looking at people in the street or supermarket and wonder if they too are hiding behind a face that says “I am okay” yet underneath there is so much pain, so much emptiness.

It is a true comfort when I receive messages from people who still remember Debs and what she meant to them, what part she played in their life.

Thank you all so much for your continued support.

2005 – 2 Years

It is unbelievable to think Debbie has been dead 2 years today. Some moments have flown by whilst others have dragged. My memorial notice this year was censored by the Maidenhead Advertiser. I submitted it and they called me back saying they could not print some of the sentences. So here is the original notice (without prejudice) for you to read.

My Sister, Debbie

Question : How do two people have the power to change the lives of hundreds of others?
Answer : By being the cause of your death.

Its 2 years or 731 days since I have seen you, spoken to you, held you, laughed with you. I think about you every day and miss you more than I ever thought I could miss anyone. I would give anything and everything to have you back for a chat, a drink, a laugh……a single sisterly hug.

Do those two people think about you? Have their lives returned to normal? Without you, normal is something my life can never be again. Every day I fight the thoughts of the things I will never have like a sister’s wedding or being an uncle. Every day I am without you……… I love you LS.

The thing that keeps blowing me away is how many people still remember Debbie, her birthday and her anniversary. I get texts and calls from people who just want to make me aware that my sister is still remembered. Its just so comforting to know that she is missed by so many people.

I still feel that it actually hasn’t hit me yet that she has gone. I just cant get my head around it that I will never see her again. Its almost like I’m lying to myself to stop the pain that would be caused if I were to try and come to terms with it. One thing is for sure and that is Debbie is remembered and honoured in the best most appropriate way. Every time, we and many others in this world have a drink with the we say the infamous saying “DING” instead of saying cheers! Even David Beckham has done it! She really has hit heights greater than we would ever have imagined.

Thanks to everyone that continues to support mum and me and also a huge thanks to everyone that is still supporting the charity. We have achieved so much from so few. Its inspiring.

Thank you everyone!

2004 – 1 Year

We have reached the first anniversary of Debbie’s accident, the launch of The Debbie Ing Memorial Fund (14 March 2003) and this website (April 2003).

During this time both mum and I, as well as the Fund have received unprecedented levels of support and donations that have been nothing short of overwhelming. The words “thank you” do not seem nearly enough to repay those people who have continued to support us through the toughest year of our lives. We really would not be where we are today if it were not for you!

Talking about last year, click here to read about my February 20th 2003. And here to read mum’s review.

As for 2004/2005, there will be many exciting pieces of news including updates on how the current projects are going as well, new projects that the fund is supporting and most importantly the up and coming fund raising events. Please return frequently to keep updated.