2023 – 20 Years

Can it really be true? Am I really writing that – 20 years? When I look back, its hard to believe its been that long, especially because, at the time, I didn’t know how I would get through the next day, let alone 20 years!

20 years is a major milestone for anything in life, but to consider not having had the light, the fun, the smile, the friendship, the loyalty and more that Debs gave to so many, selflessly, is nothing short of just plain sad. It wont be too many years in the future, and we all will have lived in a World where Debs has been gone, longer than she was here. That is just depressing.

I have talked before about trying to make the memories and reminders a positive thing. I’m glad to say that is working about 90% of the time. There are still times when I am caught off guard and for a split second, I get sad. But that’s ok. I am human after all. So I give my self that moment to feel the emotions, to be conscious of them and in a twisted way, understand that I am only feeling that because of how special Debs was. As the saying goes, grief is the price we pay to have loved someone so deeply.

I thought it was interesting to consider what Debs would have made of the World a few years ago when we were locked down due to Covid. For some it was, and still is, a nightmare. For Deb’s I think it would have been a blessing. Like I did with my family, I think she would have treated it like a surprise gift that she had to spend time with her nearest and dearest. But then fast forward to today, and the World is a very different place – yet again.

How would Debs be coping today with the cost of living, the war, the social unrest etc etc etc…….. well I think she would say “F*!k them and f*!k it. I am still being me. I am still going to look after my family. I am still going to see my friends. I am still going to love and laugh like I always do.” I saw every possible side to Debs over the years. Some amazing, some not so, and some I want to forget. But how I remember Debs is her head thrown back in loud, outrageous laughter with her arms holding her stomach as the laughing starts to hurt. I remember her being supportive, kind and caring. And I remember her putting those that meant the most to her, first.

We all need to be a little more like Debs in our lives and if there were more people like her in this World, it would definitely be a much kinder, safer and caring place in which to bring up our children. Whatever life’s journey throws at you over the next 12 months, I hope you catch yourself at times, laughing so hard your stomach hurts – I am sure Debs will be laughing with you!

Finally, thanks to everyone who continues to remember Debs as well as those who send me and mum the odd message.

Take care

Ding! x